lifestyle

How to Create your Own Sacred Space.

How to Create your Own Sacred Space.

Have you ever heard of the term sacred space?

It’s incredibly important to create and celebrate sacred space within our lives. I’m not just talking about a nicely decked out living room or boudoir (although those are lovely of course 😉)

Creating sacred space is a beautiful way in which to honour yourself, ask for guidance, connect more deeply to yourself, have somewhere for 5 minutes of quiet and introspection, a chance to step out of the fight or flight response, a space to do yoga, somewhere to practice meditation, relax, to set intentions for the day or week, listen to music, and purposefully create a positive vision for your life.

Simply put, your sacred space is your temple. A place or space reserved purely for your highest good. As you refocus on your inner life, you’ll find yourself calmer, clearer, happier and more inspired to follow your heart.

What is Life Coaching?

What is Life Coaching?

IT’S ALL A BIT OVERWHELMING ISN’T IT?

Sometimes we know we need help with something, perhaps we feel stuck in a rut or have a particular idea in mind that we want to achieve but it can be hard to know where, or who, to turn to.

Coaches + mentors are professionally trained (or should be :)) to use and teach techniques that can - quite simply - change the direction of people’s lives. Tools that help you to look at things in a new way, help you to move through something which was causing you pain, frustration or upset and to help you learn to look at yourself and your life with a newfound respect, love and appreciation.

Being Your Own Village

Sometimes life requires us to be our own village. To stand strong on our own and not let the wind be taken from our sails. 

What the hell are you jabbering on about Frou? Patience, smarty pants, patience. 🙏🏼

When we pursue or go after that big beautiful bag of dreams it often requires us to be in the possession of many different skill sets, some of which are totally alien to us. Most of us will rely on our village or network for support in the form of leaning on loved ones during times of hardship as we charter the unknown, asking for favours from acquaintances, right through to paying someone for their specialised skills. Think website designers, photographers, social media mangers, etc.
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Through our lifetimes we naturally embody many roles, all of which are representative of our capacity for self sufficiency and self determination. There are many different moments in our lives, where we are required to be our own counsellor, friend, teacher, caregiver, healer and student.

On a daily basis, whether consciously or otherwise, you're adapting and learning the tools you need to take care of yourself. In today's culture we are groomed to pick one thing to be good at, one thing to master and excel at in life. While learning and specialising in one discipline isn't inherently bad, it often leaves us feeling massively uncomfortable making decisions on our own for ourselves, regarding health, wellbeing and happiness. To take responsibility for our own lives is really just a matter of believing that we can cope with and learn the necessary skills so that whatever may come our way we are strong enough both inside and out to deal with it.
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So being your own village doesn't mean you're telling everyone to 'eff off nor is it about embracing isolation or closing off from other people. By being your own village you're actually strengthening the connection for not only your inner landscape and ability to make the choices to charter your own ship (come on, we're all going on a journey here...the journey of lifeeeeee 🤗 cheeseeeee 🧀🙊😂) BUT it also strengthens your outer village or your homies and peeps as I believe some people call them!

Just How Much Do You Want it?

We're surrounded by passive aggressive societal guilt trips on a daily basis, jumping out at us from beneath our screens, screaming, ‘hey you, chubs, don’t you know abs are made in the kitchen’, a society that hails us to be better and do better every single day. A society that tells us there's no excuses, plain old black and white - how much do you want it? 

Let's face it, life ain't perfect (in fact it's really freaking hard, it's full of twists and turns, ups and downs and not to mention the u-turns and plot twists thrown in just for bants 😲) so I'm calling you on it and asking you to give yourself a compliment. 

Yes you.

Right here, right now. Just one thing that's not based on aesthetics that you like about yourself... ✨

What's the first thought that comes to mind? 

Either comment below or email me (francesca@deathbylycra.com)⠀⠀⠀

Why me? I am not enlightened, I drink coffee, eat meat, get pissed off, feel more than emotional on any given day, fight with loved ones, have insomnia and days where I hate my body. I don't possess a magic key to life only a desire to create space for people to transform their lives and to facilitate work in the areas in which people want to wake up, shake up and dream up. Think of me like a taxi driver to a deeper dimension. Simply helping you get to where you need to go.

So if we know life isn't perfect then neither should we be. Perfect is boring and perfect is beige. And who's got time for beige? (All the beige lovers be like 🙋🏼🙋🏽🍞)⠀⠀⠀

So sometimes you just need a freaking donut, a glass of wine, maybe even a bucket of wine - hoho - heck sometimes you have the kind of days where a shot of tequila in the eye and a Valium tranquilizer seems like the only viable solution. We’ve all been there my friend.

And what's more, most of us will still do all the above but just mentally torture the crap out of ourselves for our sins or lack of willpower after. And why? Why do you think it's okay to be so mean to yourself? We all do it but it doesn't make it okay. 

It's not always easy but those shades of grey are the moments you look back on with fondness as a life well lived - so today whether you grab the pizza, hit a yoga class, dance on tables or sprinkle cacao nibs from Narnia everywhere - whether it be with friends, with the cat or simply in our own company - just own wherever you are at today.

Allowing ourselves to make conscious choices and taking responsibility for ourselves is not easy, nor is it an overnight journey. There's no end goal or destination. Just you, me and a whole lot of love for this thing we call life. 

Now, tequila for one anyone? 

Are you Suffering Perfection Paralysis?

Are you Suffering Perfection Paralysis?

Have you ever heard of the term perfection paralysis? One of the ultimate quests for millennials is the pursuit of the perfect life. We're all searching for it.

We want do it all, see it all and be it all...like, yesterday. But in our search for the perfect body, the perfect job, the perfect apartment, the perfect partner and the perfect friends are we so afraid of making the wrong choice, of committing, of making a mistake or simply overwhelmed with the vast options presented in front of us that we are merely bystanders on the sidelines of our own lives, only ever dipping our toes into the arena we call life? Are we a generation of commitment-phobes or are just in need of a new approach? 

Body Talk...

Words by Frou Williams.

Celebration of the female form. Loving yourself and feeling good about your body are really, REALLY hard things to do. Unfortunately, you can't run away from it and you certainly can't pretend it's not there.

It's kind of a mind, body and soul combo deal we have going on here folks. 🤔 Even in the depths of self loathing and despair, your body is there for you, reminding you, "Hello, sad clown. I am here to both haunt and serve you."

When I'm feeling low or having a day like a beached whale 🐳 (yes all us mere mortals have those days 🙋🏼), I try to take comfort in the humour of that.

Hate it or love it, your body is not going anywhere. The beauty is in enjoying the journey of wellbeing for what it is - a never ending journey and trying to figure out how to coexist peacefully and laugh about it along the way.

Beginner’s Guide: Health 101

Words by Frou Williams.

That user manual you mentioned...

Just imagine, how much easier our lives would be if we were born with a 'user manual' or 'owner's guide' where we could unlock the key that tells each of us what we need to eat and how to live a healthy lifestyle.

But you see, each person has their own unique story with food which makes there billions of different complexities that can factor into how we choose to eat and live our lives that go way beyond calories.

So where do we start?

Nowadays we live in an information rich society whist whilst for the most part is something that we are incredibly lucky to have and to be given such an array or opportunities to chose from, but when it comes to the mind field that is the 'diet' or 'nutrition' fuelling our bodies can sometimes be a tad overwhelming and even downright stressful. Generally, we tend to eat out of habit, whether that has been passed down to us or from our own patterns that we've formed over time.

What do we do about it?

Well, firstly we need to listen to our bodies, they are much smarter than us! Secondly, we need to learn how to step out of the rigid and restrictive paradigm which is backed and rallied by the glossies and social media archives of passive aggressive quotes screaming 'abs are made in the kitchen' and where picture after picture of the unattainable perfect body is laid out before our impressionable little eyes. We need to retrain our thoughts to prevent the hammering of mental and physical torture that we put ourselves through and simply, learn how to play again.

To explore our bodies and how good they are capable of feeling. We are designed to move, to flow and to feel free - free of fear whether that be from mind or body. How do we eliminate a fear that is so ingrained and instilled in our society? The most important ingredient of playing is fun. Besides feeling good, you're actually learning when you're having fun so if educate ourselves in order to make conscious food choices and adopt a suitable exercise regime that suits our individual needs and goals then we can explore ways to have fun within these realms.

Playfulness is in our nature, in our roots. Like animals, we're born with an instinct to play. It's the state of mind that defines play, not the activity itself. Even hippopotami do handstands underwater so when did we get so serious and place those shackles around our own wrists, heads and hearts?

 

"You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation" Plato (427-347 B.C)


By today's standards play is viewed as immature, nonproductive and worse, a waste of time but with the ever increasing pace and stresses of modern life, where we can't be sure of anything anymore, a job or a relationship could be gone tomorrow, it's most important than ever to bring back playful pursuits. We need to help each other. Human beings have always thrived within a community so why not build a community steeped in fundamental knowledge which is explored through playfulness and love in which we can share, collaborate and learn from one another?

Hugs,

Frou xo

Stop! Sleep, it's a Funny old Thing…

Words by Frou Williams.

No stranger to the phenomenon that is night terrors and insomnia, it got me thinking about the concept of sleep.

We all know that sleep is essential for life, it’s a chance for our bodies and minds to repair after a hard day's work, for cells to regenerate and give our digestive system a rest.

There’s few things better than jumping into a freshly made duvet to get warm and snuggle under the covers with a fresh breeze filtering around the room.

Or the cloud as I like to call my bed.

People say, ‘I’m going to sleep now,’ as if it were nothing. But when you think about it, it’s really a bizarre activity. You might as well say, ‘For the next several hours, while the sun is gone, I’m going to become unconscious, temporarily losing command over everything I know and understand. When the sun returns, I will resume my life.’

If you didn’t know what sleep was, and you had only seen it in some kind of science fiction film, you would probably think it was seriously weird and tell all your friends about that crazy film you’d seen.

So if you had to describe sleep to someone how would you do it?

They had these people, you know? And they would walk around all day, going about their everyday lives and everything was just normal. And then, once a day, usually after dark, they would lie down on these special platforms and become unconscious. They would stop functioning almost completely, except deep in their minds they would have adventures and experiences that were completely impossible in real life. As they lay there, completely vulnerable to their enemies, their only movements were to occasionally shift from one position to another; or, if one of the ‘mind adventures’ got too real, they would sit up and scream and be glad they weren’t unconscious anymore. Then they would drink a lot of coffee.’

Weird, huh?

So, the next time you see someone sleeping, why not add some fun to your day and make believe you’re in a science fiction film and whisper, ‘The creature is regenerating itself.’ People might think you're crazy but who wants to normal anyway? 😉

Hugs,

Frou xo